Weighty matters

I spill a lot of ink about body image and some people think I'm a little obsessed with it. I'll be the first to admit that I am. Which is exactly why I was both touched and disturbed by this article in WaPo a friend of mine tweeted about today. For anyone who has known someone struggling with an eating disorder this is particularly difficult to read. But Sarah's story worth telling. Not simply because eating disorders need more attention, but because in many ways it's all a matter of degrees.

I've never suffered from an eating disorder, but I came scarily close when I was 13 years old. I ate nothing but crackers for three weeks and lost a total of 15 pounds. And I remember feeling like a failure afterward, thinking I could have lost more and feeling overwhelmed by the disappointment of still being fat. My friends intervened (I've fallen out or lost touch with most of them since, but they will always hold a special place in my heart) and I was back on track in a matter of months.

Since then I've had my ups and down and tried every diet under the sun. I eventually trimmed down with the help of Weight Watchers, slow and steady - the way it's supposed to be done. In 2007, I lost a lot of weight, nearly 30 percent of my starting weight. Then in 2008, I gained 10 pounds and went through yet another period of feeling inadequate in every way. I'm not proud of the amount of time I've spent counting calories and looking in the mirror, wishing I was 10 or 20 pounds lighter, but it is a part of me in a way I cannot put into words.

I'm smart, funny and loyal, but I would have never used any of those words to describe myself. I would have used one word: fat. The word that followed me my whole life and dominated everything I did. And although I could never pretend to know what Sarah went through or what her family is going through now, I know that's easy for young women to reduce their entire self worth to a single attribute: their weight.

Eating disorders are not simply exaggerated body image issues -- there are many factors contributing to this serious mental illness, but I firmly believe they could not exist without our obsession with perfection.

We are constantly bombarded with images of fat and thin, right and wrong. And it is nearly impossible to ignore them.

There are few things more important in life than taking care of oneself and being healthy, but we are so much more than what we see in the mirror -- no matter how large or small.